Sean is absorbed in a programming project, so basically it’s like I’m single at the moment. I told him I don’t mind because once this little girl is born he will not have a chance to while away hours and hours writing code. In the meantime, I find myself sitting here, tired of books and West Wing episodes and listening to 80’s love songs and contemplating a good use of my time tonight. Erik gave a wonderful Family Home Evening lesson on journals tonight, so I guess I’m feeling like it would be valuable to post a bit of life at the moment.
We’re down to the tail end of this pregnancy and, although contractions have all but stopped (perfect timing, right?), I now find myself feeling like I’ve been beaten with a baseball bat in some back ally somewhere. It doesn’t usually last more than an hour or so, but it repeats itself a few times throughout the day and night. I am really feeling way too old for this. ;> The upside is, sans contractions, I can actually get some things done during the day. Yea!
Life is really wonderful, though. I have felt uplifted and strengthened by power beyond my own. We have been the recipients of little pockets of sunshine and love as people have randomly dropped off dinners or offered to take Alyx on an outing. It has touched my heart. Sometimes I feel like I have a Grinchy heart that is “three sizes too small”, but then stuff like this happens and I feel like my heart is going to burst. And I want to do something to make sure the whole world feels this kind of love.
I brainstormed a little list in my daily notebook entitled “Scatter Sunshine” with ideas for doing just that – for helping people feel loved and watched over. I find if I can focus on making life better for someone else it makes these long days of waiting go by a little bit faster, and more meaningfully. Some days I do some good, and some days I don’t, and that’s okay – all I can do is try. ;>
I know this is a ramble-y little post. And I applaud you if you made it all the way to the end without falling asleep or closing out the window. Here’s to waiting and doing something while you wait. ;> My love to all you finishers. ;>